This would have gone on forever. You're an avoider.

这样下去没完没了 你就只会逃避。

You are what Elizabeth classifies as an 'admin avoider'.

你属于被伊丽莎白划分为" 自我管理逃避者" 的那一类。

The avoider often grows up in a less affectionate home that values independence and self-reliance.

逃避者通常在一个不那么深情的家中长大，这种家庭重视独立和自力更生。

238.This would have gone on forever. You're an avoider.

这样下去没完没了 你就只会逃避。

And just remember that conflict avoiders are not the ones doing it wrong.

请记住，避免冲突的人并不是做错事的人。

European Union finance ministers have reached an agreement that will make it more difficult for tax avoiders to hide their money.

欧盟各国财长达成了一项协议，使得逃税者隐匿他们的资金更加困难。

What? - I had to. This would have gone on forever. You're an avoider.

什么？-我也是不得已。这样下去没完没了。你就只会逃避。

It's classic avoider behavior of just being like, oh, I'm so glad that everything's okay.

这是典型的回避行为，就像，哦，我很高兴一切都好。

In order for avoiders to cultivate healthy long-lasting relationship, they need to learn how to open up and express their emotions honestly.

为了得到健康长久的关系，他们需要学会开诚布公地表达自己的情感。

But avoiders, I think one of the things to know is that you're valuing something that's really important.

但对于回避者来说，我认为要知道的一件事是，你正在重视一些真正重要的东西。

And I think partly what avoiders often think is that by being direct, by raising the difficult conversation, they're hurting someone.

我认为，回避者常常认为，通过直接、通过提出困难的谈话，他们正在伤害别人。

That's such a good point, because there are going to be 100 moments in that difficult conversation where you're going to want to default to your avoider style.

这是一个很好的观点，因为在这场困难的谈话中，有 100 个时刻你会想要默认你的回避风格。

If you have the avoider love style, as a child, you may have grown up in a home that didn't show a lot of affection, that put more focus on being independent and self-reliant.

如果你有回避型的爱，那么你小时候可能成长在一个没有表现出太多感情的家庭中，这个家庭更注重独立和自力更生。

As children, avoiders learn to take care of themselves starting at a very young age and put their feelings and needs on hold to deal with their anxieties of having little to no comfort from their parents.

作为孩子，避免者学会从很小的时候就开始照顾自己，并把他们的感受和需求搁置起来，藉以处理来自於缺少父母安慰而产生的焦虑。

As you lay these all out, I just want to leave the room because I'm so conflict avoidant, and I'm wondering – what do conflict avoiders like me need to know about our natural tendency to shy away from disagreements?

当你把这些都列出来时，我只想离开房间，因为我是如此回避冲突，我想知道——像我这样的冲突避免者需要了解我们回避分歧的自然倾向吗？